Bouncing off Clouds

Well thats the title of the music flavor of the moment. As I have written before, I get obsessed with songs...this one is just a happy go lucky kind of song by Tori Amos. It just makes me think of a happy sunny day outside...so its what I have been listening to lately (much to Drew's chagrin) He is NOT a fan of Tori. As a matter of fact, he downloaded the song for me, and in a note he wrote (I quote) "more than happy to download songs for you, but when I did the Tori songs, I think I threw up a little in my mouth..." haha funny boy...(eye roll here hahaha) Im just in a Tori mood, also been listening to her "raspberry swirl", "blue sky" and some others from the Choir Girl Hotel. I think I tend to like her more obscure songs than the ones on her main stream cds. I have no idea what albums these songs came off of, think they are sort of "B" side or unrleased songs. Very un-tori like if you are used to "under the pink" or something like that...they are almost techno like songs...happy quick bouncy, but still somehow moody songs.

So its been awhile since my last post, a few weeks anyway. Not too much to report. My parents came, had a good V-day weekend with them...they left, and when they left they also left a nasty chest cold I am still tring to get rid of. I hate being sick, its like being in a tired achy sickly cocoon where the world just kinda passes by and I dont want to do anything but sleep...blah! Hopefully it will leave me alone soon!!

Other than that, back to the usual, job searching, sending resumes, dreaming about houses and looking at real estate in NC. Doggie play dates with Ellie the chocolate lab next door...and back to taking Emmitt on runs now that its not too fridgid for him.

Stranger things have happened.

So as I stated in my last blog, its been..well lets just say windy. The siding of the houses have been coming off and the gusts have been up to 65 mph! Needless to say I have been hiding out in the gym for fear of decapitation by cheap metal house siding. Now where I go to the gym I am basically the only little white girl, so the music is ahhh shall we say "ethnic." Nothing I ever listen to, I always wear my headphones when I go so I can block out the pounding of the ghetto music. Until recently....Now I have a very eccletic arrangement of music on my ipod. Thanks to growing up in the 80s and 90s I have everything from Color Me Badd, to Enya, to Flock of Seagulls and lots of "dance" house and techno music. Its happened now 4 times...when I look up from reading or whatever, the music in the gym is the same as the song playing on my ipod...maybe a few seconds off. First time it was the Cars, "you might think," then Color Me Badd "i wanna sex you up," and today Cut Copy...cant remember wich song...but it was STRANGE...how does that happen? Usually its like madonna, mariah carey, justin timberlake or lots of pop artists i dont know, and dont care to know that they play....it just strikes me as very very odd.

I did go on a short run today, let my legs and my mind wander. I realize I havent done what really "feeds" me...now everyone knows I like the outdoors, but what I truley love (and part of the draw to AZ) is going out in my car with a map up into the mts or the woods or somewhere realy remote to just explore and go on an adventure. My friends and I used to just go with my wagon (sowe could put the seats down,) food, water, hiking stuff and sleeping bags and drive into the mts and go hiking and swimming and exploring, sometimes fishing....There is nothing better (I think) than going to Colorado and sleeping out under the Milky Way...yes the sky is that clear. I miss those adventures....I mean I'm not a go to a resort and stay at a hotel and shop for vacation kind of girl....I think if Drew came to me and said..."lets just go away to the middle of nowhere Colorado or Montanna and explore" I would drop everything and go in a second! Nature, and the beauty of it just moves me.....I have been known to be stargazing or watching a beautiful sunset over mountains and just cry for the beauty of it....Oh I miss miss miss that...I hate hate hate the city...the archetecture, the streets, the people...Often when I am in teh city I get annoyed and think about how we have ruined the natural beauty of the earth by our ugly cement, cinder, and pavement. I think I am in some serious need of a road trip out west...who's with me (and yes, this means prob no nice showers...) hehehehe

Oh the wiiiiinnnnd!

Wow, can anyone believe this wind? We live in like a wind tunnel, the way they just leveled all the trees and then made streets with houses on both sides. Its brutal, thank goodness its warm. Emmitt and I had a quick jog around the neighborhoods here, he hated it as much as I. I assume he gets sand in his eyes too, cause I know I certainly do, and I'm at a much higher elevation off the ground than he. It kept me up all night, I love the sound of gentle wind thruough evergreen's like we have here...it started out pleasant, so I opened the windows to let it lull me to sleep...tho by the time Drew came to bed it was getting violent out there, and we had to shut the window. I could still hear it, hear the random branches breaking off, and things flying by the window.

Yea Hil, I hear ya about the sounds I am that way with smells too. Do you ever get the strong feelings of de ja vou? I often feel like situations I have already had in a dream. That whole week last year seemed surreal, and at the same time I sort of also felt like I had dreamt parts. That sunday you went with your dad in the ambulance, I woke up knowing I had to call the house, not Drew's cell phone, didn't even bother with thinking about what number to call, just automatically dialed the 717#, no hesitation or trying to remember it. It was like I called it often (tho prob hadn't since like 2001 or something. Very strange. I remember that whole week feeling pulled in random directions, and cant remember why I did or said things. Maybe it was just lack of sleep, too much emotion, stress or just the surreality of the situation....

Anyway, I am rambling now.
I am excited for the promise of spring, I always like to think of these winds and weird weather patterns as the warm weather's way of pushing its way back. Yesterday Drew and I took Emmitt on a nice run/walk and stayed out later than usual. I could smell the earth thawing, and feel soft warm air...it was almost 70 yesterday. Yeah for SPRING!

68 is Grrreat!

Wow 68 degrees....Emmitt was in love! He was so chill on our walk, I practically had to pull him along, all he wanted to do way lay in the sun anywhere he could! haha.
I opened our door, and he just slept in the sun, waking only to watch whatever was moving go by. He was in heaven! Such a good dog too, didn't move an inch when he saw a car or person go by. Unfortunately there are so many kids under 3 in the neighborhood, all outside now too...so I had to close the door. Hes not happy with me, he is laying by the front door waiting for me to open it again....not gonna happen dog! You make the kids nervous! Plus they Loooove his tail, its so enticing. The three year old next door got a hold of it, pretty quickly. He has a spaniel, so no tail to pull there. He saw Emmitt's and grabbed it as fast as he could! haha. Fortunately for just that reason I pull his tail so he's not so startled by it. He jsut sorta gave the little boy (harry) a wet nose nudge..good thing I'm such a child! hehe.

Boo for the Flu!

Ugh, nothing I hate more than being sick! Yesterday at 4 I started to get dizzy, and feel all weird. Pounding headache, and that urge to be sick everywhere! I laid down on the couch until about 8pm, finally felt ok enough to head to bed...of course this morning, wonderful surprise...I got my period on top of it...so headache backache dizzyness and just absolute exhaustion! Like I needed both at the same time! Oh well, i usually hav to get this at least one time a year...so hopefully this is my yearly sickness! Its nice out so I can go groan outside in the sun :)

On the plus side, my parents have decided to come visit next weekend for 3 days! yeah! I know I saw them in dec, but it always feels like FOREVER!!

Sniff it, sniff it good...

This is a little tidbit of information you all might not know, Drew is a singer/songwriter at heart. Usually he doesn't stray from singing my name, singing about things I do or say or wear....Though lately he has been singing about Emmitts unusual habits.
Emmitt tends to be a connoisseur of poop spots. He may be freezing his little tail off, but he can't go until he finds just the right one..So last night it was cold (oh what shocker) and Emmitt had to go BAD! He was nearly bursting, but he refused to just go..so he sniffs the ground as he practically runs down the sidewalk insearch of the perfect place to soil.
So to the tune of Devo's "whip it" Drew started singing....if your walkin down the stree...he will sniff it, every dog butt that he meet's he will sniff it...now sniff it, sniff it good....and so on, the song went as long as the walk for Emmitt to relieve himself took...just more and more lines about the dog sniffing trees, and knees...etc...hahaha!
Emmitt, you are a nut!! But we looove you :)

Yogi Tea for the heart

Well in the spirit of Valentine's month, I have been getting a few "heart felt" (hehe) yogi-teaisms.

"Every heartbeat creates a miracle."

"Your heartbeat is the rhythm of your soul"

and finally,

"There is no love without compassion."

And thats Yogi for today :) mmmm tea.

Holy testicle Tuesday (ok monday)

Wow, are Emmitt and I lucky or what?! Two beautiful days in a row...I can only hope it stays like this...I mean comon, its groundhogs day, doesnt that count for anything??
I obviously remember this time last year, it was definitely cold and windy and icy (among other things.)
I was thinking today, on a long doggie walk, about everything thats happened since we moved here. My parents warnings not to move to "Baltimurder" for fear I would be shot/mugged/raped/haave my car broken into etc...and how much I hated it, hated my life, hated my 4 freakin hr commute, hated my loans, hated missing my family, hated the cold and the uglyness of the area hated hate hated...I can remember times on my runs just wanting to throw myself into oncoming traffic, or jump off one of the bridges I run over into the next county over...but always holding onto hope that things would get better.
I remember falling and breaking my elbow and not being able to paint murals anymore, and not wanting to leave the confines of my apartment...ever for several months.
This time of year has always seemed hard for me. Christmas and New Year's passed, no more fun holidays...the snow and ice wearing on my nerves, losing my papa, my closest aunt, and most recently John all during the first 2 months of Feb....pretty random...apparently people should stay faaarrr away from me in Feb..haha
Anyway, I'm not sure why I was thinking about all these things...maybe just since the sun felt so good I could allow them into my consciousness with out getting too upset, the sun always makes me smile.
Either way, I'm happy I never acted upon any attempts to end my life...there's just too many sunny days that I need to experience.

short post...

My blog for the day is...whoohooo
rachel yogi says if its 60....go out, and don't go back inside...
theres sun and warmth now, but tomorrow may bring snow!!!